Sunday, November 11, 2012

The Next Girl

Have you ever run into an ex with their next girlfriend/boyfriend, the person you've been replaced by? I always dread those run-ins. There are only 2 ways it can go: the new gf/bf is stunning and you feel like a pile of shit that's been stepped in or THIS delightfulness can happen...

I dated JJ for about 4 months, the relationship went fast and furious before collapsing in on itself spectacularly. I realized post-break-up that he was a serial dater, and an alcoholic...actually I saw signs of both early on but stupidly ignored them. Despite his issues, I was pretty upset when things ended.

About 3 months after split, I was at SFO waiting for Bart back into the city when I spotted JJ on the platform...with a girl...and she was NOT cute. Fuck yeah! She had dyed red hair and a weird face, and...just not cute.

I walked over to say hello, because why the hell not when the new girl is unattractive. JJ and I chatted about where we were returning from (they were in Chicago for Not Cute Girl's friend's wedding, I was coming back from a business slash personal trip to Atlanta) and he forgot to introduce me. So I introduced myself to the girl, reaching to shake her hand. She gave me a weak handshake (I can't stand a weak handshake, the least you can do is put some grip into it!) which cemented my opinion that she sucked.

The train arrived so I said "SO nice to meet you" to Not Cute Girl  and "see you around" to JJ, then boarded a car further down the platform. I spent the Bart ride home finding a picture of the girl online to send to my friends (I found her full name through his Facebook friend list, then Googled her for an image...the internet is AHmazing!).

Not 2 minutes after I texted my friend, he sent back a picture of Eric Stoltz's character in The Mask saying "she totally looks like this...YOU WIN!" 


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